Hi family,
God wants all of His children walking in the joy of the Lord, but unfortunately, some people do not really want to be happy ~ they will not discipline themselves to make right choices and so they just live in the pits, defeated and depressed. And understand, you cannot change people ~ you can encourage them; you can speak faith into them, but ultimately, you cannot make them do what is right. I say this respectfully, but you are not responsible for their happiness; you are only responsible for your own happiness. You need to have the attitude: If you do not want to be happy, that is fine, but you are not going to keep me from being happy. If you want to live in the pits, that is fine, but I am not going to get in there with you. Sometimes, we have to love people from a distance. You may have family members, relatives, and friends that are good people, but you cannot be around them all the time. You can be respectful, but you should not spend all your time with what I call toxic people ~ People that are always negative and bring out the worst in you, that irritate you and always want to argue – the less time you spend with people like that, that better off you are going to be.
I realize sometimes we do not have a choice – we may work with someone that almost on purpose does things to aggravate you; they feel like it is their calling to make you miserable, but you need to change your approach. Do not let them upset you. If you let that get under your skin, all you are doing is empowering them. If they can frustrate you, they know they can control you. The next time they do something to up set you, stay in peace – do not give in. If they are rude, just keep a smile on your face. If they leave you out, overlook you on purpose, do not let it bother you. Do not give it the time of day. If you rise above that and keep your joy, you are not fueling it. In other words, you are taking away their power. As long as they know that can push your buttons, they are going to keep doing that.
The Scripture declares in Psalm 94:13 (AMP) that God has given us the power to stay calm in times of adversity. Here is the key: what you feed is going to grow. You have to stop giving into those wrong emotions. The next time you get stuck in traffic and you are tempted to get upset, do not feed it. If someone is rude to you, just overlook it. Do not let it ruin your day and steal your joy. If you will stop feeding those wrong feelings, they will get weaker and weaker and eventually, they will not affect you anymore.
Another thing that is so important is that we do not blow things out of proportion. We have to learn to adapt and to adjust. We cannot wait for others to change, we have to change.
Some people go year after year and let the same things upset them. If they get caught in traffic, they respond a certain way. We need to take inventory and find out what is stealing our joy . What are we allowing to upset us? What is causing us to go through the day stressed out? Identify what it is and then make a decision that you are going to change your approach in those areas.
If we are caught in traffic, getting upset is not going to make it go any faster. If someone is rude to us, being rude back will not make you feel better in the long run. It is only going to ruin your day. If our plans do not work out, let us stay in peace. Instead of getting upset, always remember that you belong to the LORD and He has always got your back.
We have to make a decision that we will not let people take our joy. When we are tempted to get upset when somebody does us wrong, we need to ask ourselves, “Is this worth giving up my joy over?” “Am I going to let this ruin my day?”
Some people do not realize they are always giving up their joy. They wonder why they are not happy – it is because they gave up their joy. People give away their joy when they have to drive in traffic; when they cannot find their keys; when they heard someone was talking about them.
Family, do not give away your joy. Life is too short to allow inconveniences and interruptions to keep us from being happy and full of God’s joy. We have to learn to handle things in the right way.
It is very freeing when you understand this principle: I do not have to give away my joy – I can live every day happy and full of joy if I want to. I do not mean that we are always jumping up and down but we are walking in a calm delight; we are at peace; rest. Not, aggravated and disappointed that things did not work out.
God is always directing our steps. He will always get us to where we are supposed to be.
Walking in the joy of the Lord,
Lisa Gordon
Jesus City Church